It was such an innocent sentence, inserted in a post just over a week ago:

“I will be free to enjoy some wind (hopefully) and decorate a bedroom (regretfully).”

Well, you can forget about enjoying the wind and amplify the ‘regretfully’; what a shit way to spend a week.

The scenario seemed simple enough. On my left we have a smartly decorated little room, awash with computers and sporting a three metre long piece of solid teak masquerading as computer table. Regular readers will recall the saga of installing the beast. On my right we have a large bedroom with a large wooden bed and the beginnings of a photography studio (3 lights and a table). She who must be obeyed, who is getting seriously into this photography lark, has grand plans for backdrops and sidedrops and all manner of props sufficient to shoot crowd scenes for a major movie. But these grand plans do not really fit in with the concept of a guest bedroom.

So…..

Convert computer room into bedroom, convert guest bedroom into computer room and photo studio, you have one week. Go!

Stage 1 was simple enough, if long-winded and boring. Remove all items of furniture from bedroom and paint walls. This involved the usual mind-numbing preparation where flaky bits of wall were sanded down to reveal collapsing bits of wall and massive volumes of plaster infill would then follow. I then carefully masked off the edges to ensure the paint only landed where it should. This turned out to be a waste of time because she who must be obeyed decided to help with the painting.

My approach to painting a wall is to carefully go round the edges with a brush, just overlapping onto the masking tape; and then use a roller for the rest. I climb a ladder for the high bits and sit on the ground for the low bits. None of that nonsense for my wife. She appeared with an old broom, and stuffed the broom handle end into the roller to produce a long and dangerous instrument of destruction. Using her extended device she could layer on paint from floor to ceiling (and on the floor and the ceiling). What she gained in reach, she lost in precision; and her shock and awe approach to decorating left a lasting impression on places that were not expecting paint, including one of the cats. To her credit, she did then spend a couple of hours with various liquids removing the stray paint, although the cat remains slightly spattered.

Off to Chonburi to collect she who must be obeyed’s iMac. On the way we drop off my truck for a 30,000 kilometre service; so I am expecting some expense.

Thanks to Antz, the iMac had been fixed via a little man who knows how to fix Macs, rather than via the Apple service centre in Bangkok. Not only was the Mac in working order, but the shop owner offered a very good price to purchase the machine. We declined, partly because the computer contains a number of photos that a certain person failed to back up; but also because it will serve as a web access machine when The Son comes to visit.

Been busy; the extent of which I can best illustrate by reporting that I have pressed the shutter button on my camera more than 4,000 times since last Tuesday, loaded all the resulting images on my computer and processed all but 500 of the photos. Thank god for a fast computer, Lightroom and two monitors. Less thanks go to the cat that expressed a regular desire to sleep on the keyboard.

It’s always good to start the new year by reading complete nonsense in the local press. I found this latest offering in The Pattaya Times; but other publications have picked it up and published it verbatim without resorting to the ridicule it deserves.

The heading of the article is “Pattaya Master Plan Excites Investors”. Given that we are currently in a depressed market with a substantial oversupply of property, this can only be a clue that massive bullshit is about to descend.

Pattaya Days 2010:

360 posts, 74,688 page views and 1679 comments.

Thank you for visiting, and extra special thanks to those of you who took the time to comment (apart from Lloyd).

As a gesture towards those who commented, I thought I should carry out an exhaustive and structured analysis of those comments. From this I have discovered a recurring request: “For god’s sake, no more horse photos”.

Here you are!:

Road accidents with multiple fatalities are a sad fact of life in Thailand.

In May, a pickup full of migrant Burmese workers crashed and killed 13 of the workers; the driver was trying to evade the police. In November, a van drove off an elevated expressway and nine occupants were killed. The driver’s attention had been diverted. Last week, five people died and fifty were injured in a fifteen vehicle pile-up. The list is long, and nobody really gives a shit; apart from those affected by the incidents. We see the news, express regret, and move on. The authorities promise to take action in respect of whatever they decided contributed to the accident, do nothing, and get back to lining their pockets. It’s the way of the world.

Started the day with a joyous trip to immigration for my 90 day report. The place was heaving, with more than a few ignoring the simple rule that you should dress decently when meeting government officials. Last week’s tank top, with matching smells, and a pair of tatty shorts, was the offering from one gentleman. Fortunately, I raised the tone with a bow-tie and silver cane.

Twenty minutes felt like hours, but back home in time to leave for a meeting to discuss a book which is apparently to be adorned with my photos. Just leaving the condo car park and receive a call to tell me the meeting is postponed; shortly followed by another call deferring a photoshoot tentatively planned for this afternoon. This is all good news because it is windy.

Most windsurfers have a few sails at the their disposal, and the smallest sail has always been bought at a moment of optimism; perhaps brought on by a few beers. This little handkerchief of a sail will only work when the wind is really howling, like it very rarely does in the Gulf of Thailand.

But today it was really windy and I was able to brush off a rather dusty and scruffy little sail which I had last used in 2009. I had planned to take some photos, but the session was cut short due to the need to go sailing, and other distractions.